LEADERSHIP COACHING: 5 Ways to Shift Your Thinking
November 4, 2012
That was when I wrote and posted my first blog, “A Renewed Sense of Purpose.” I will admit I was reluctant at the time to write a post because I did not believe I had anything to share that anyone would want to read and I was not very confident in my writing. One month prior I had sat down to dinner with George Couros. He had been blogging for quite some time and he tried to convince me that I needed to share my story with others. For the next month, I continued to put off starting a blog, each time using the excuse that I would do it tomorrow. And of course, tomorrow became the next day, the next day, and so on. Why did I continue to find an excuse not to start?
Simply put, I was scared.
Today, I want to share my thoughts on a few things that I have reflected on many times as though I was sitting back in the Interview Chair. I knew I needed to get past my fears and find the courage if I wanted to become the best version of myself. And then a dear friend of mine challenged me not to wait until tomorrow, but rather to strive to be tomorrow…today.
Here are 5 things I hope will support you moving forward in both your daily work and your daily life.
1. Avoid the B3’s – in other words, the bottom third. Do your best to avoid those individuals who either can’t or won’t celebrate your successes with you. For whatever reason, those who live in the bottom third cannot be genuinely happy for others when they experience any amount of positive attention or are recognized for their accomplishments. They tear others down through their negativity and in many instances, relish in others’ personal failures. These people not only want to remain status quo, but they judge others who strive to be better. So how are you managing these individuals in your life today, whether it be in your professional or personal life? Go back to the interview chair and remind yourself that you will not allow others to live rent-free in your head.
2. Don’t Allow Anyone to Take Away Your Excellence: I believe this is one of the most difficult challenges we face every day in education, especially if you currently find yourself in a negative work environment. Our profession is filled with average. Our students and staff deserve so much more. You deserve so much more! It is easy to be duped by the average disguised as good. Just as success breeds success, it takes excellence to recognize excellence. I firmly believe that we have way too many people in our lives who are waiting for tomorrow when they need to be excellent today. The truth is it takes courage and a strong will to be excellent because well, the B3’s are waiting to bring you down. Bring your excellence every day and don’t let anyone or any organization kidnap your best! Remember, excellence doesn’t negotiate.
3. Recognize that kids will live up to the standards and expectations that we have of them. I often remind others that kids will do what we allow them to do. Low expectations of kids or finding reasons why they cannot or will not do something in most cases is a direct result of our expectations and actions. The truth is kids are going to act like their age about 80% of the time. However, it is what we expect and demand of the 20% that will determine the level of maturity and leadership kids will bring to a class, a team or an important event when the moment arrives that we need them to respond appropriately. I recall a coach sharing this example when taking her players to an important dinner event. She allowed the kids to use their 80% while on the bus to act and enjoy themselves like the teenagers they were, but before exiting the bus, she reminded them how she had shared with them that there are moments when she needed their 20% and this was one of those times. I have long since remembered this when kids are in class, in the hallways, at an assembly, at a recognition event, or at a performance to let them have their 80%, as long as we have shared with them our expectations for their 20% when the time calls for it. It is amazing the results you will get in return when you share and expect their best!
4. Our internal attitudes determine how quickly we can recover from failure. What is your inner voice saying to you? Is it saying that something isn’t fair? Is it telling you that you can’t do something? Is it telling you that you are overwhelmed? The fact is we fail every day as educators, but our failure doesn’t have to define us, especially if we aspire to be excellent. I know that my personal excellence starts over each day and that each day is truly a new day to be great and what I do with it is up to me.
5. Who would you list on your Life Board of Directors? Take a moment and think about those individuals whom you look up to and aspire to emulate. So ask yourself today – who would be on your life board of directors and who would you list as the Chairperson of your professional life? Are the people you would list representative of the legacy you want to leave behind? Do they have the courage and fortitude to always do the right thing? Do they model the importance of serving a greater cause? Take time today to list your personal board of excellence.
So why was I scared to start a personal blog that would be accessible to the world to see? Well, it’s because I was scared of the 33% and I was scared to allow others to take away what I believed was the little excellence I had. When you go through school your whole life feeling like a failure and lack the confidence to formulate any thoughts in order to put them on paper; well, you find any reason you can not to follow through even though you really want to for fear of what the B3's will do to you. And then by luck you cross paths with someone like George Couros who pushes you and encourages you to look past your deficiencies because he believes you have something to offer. And then you realize that you are responsible for your own morale and you decide for yourself that failure is a part of life and that your personal excellence starts over each day. And the next thing you know you wake up one day 10 years later and you have now authored several books and you wonder, “How did that happen?”
Maybe, just maybe, it is because I finally decided to be tomorrow…today!
I am thrilled at the response regarding the Hire for Excellence virtual workshop – Why First Impressions Matter, scheduled for March 22. In this virtual session, I will share my framework on Hiring for Excellence. Attendees will leave with an understanding of hiring processes and resources to better equip themselves as they prepare for the hiring season.
Register today for this interactive workshop here.
